Parenting through my Kaliedoscope

Life beyond studies...

Well, this is for all the moms out there who have children at the point of transition from school to college.  Life exists beyond engineering and medicine in this world. The world doesnt end if your child doesn’t prefer any of the science streams to pursue in her/his life.  They will still shine with the lucrative careers they feel like taking up. Gone were the days , when you stress your children out in the form of lectures and your ambitions. Today’s children have a sound mind of their own, they are capable of taking independent decisions at a very young age.

Rules to follow for all cool Moms:

1. Never ever pressurize your children with your thoughts..

It is easy for parents to force their thoughtforms on children. We think we have the right to do that. We do but not to the extent of stressing them out of their young lives. They are young and they deserve a happy teenhood by all means.  Of course, mild dosages of advice when they go astray without being overly righteous about it is always welcome. In other words, subtle advice always scores well with teenagers and long lectures are definitely out of question.

2. Be content with their choice

If your choice and their choice coincides, it is well and good. But in reality, it never does. Call it generation gap or fate, it is upto you. The best thing to do is to be completely content with their choice of career path. I am sure your children will reap maximum benefits if you choose that attitude to deal with them.

3. Have faith in their potentials and dreams

Each child born in this world has a divine purpose to fulfil in life. Each child is unique and special. Every child’s potential , skill sets, strengths  differ. So help them dream big.. help them set their pace..after all, dreams change lives. So help them manifest their dreams into actions and deeds.

4. There is whole wide world out there with a myriad of opportunities..

The world is big and there is an ocean of opportunites that opens up before them. Teach them to be “go getters”in life .  Teach them the survival skills. Teach them to be leaders. Teach them to be content. Teach them to see the positive side of life always, that is to see the ray of sunshine amidst their setbacks in life. Most importantly, teach them  to believe in themselves. Teach them the phrase” Carpe diem”by all means.

5. Be supportive so that they can shine or excel in what they do.
There are support groups online and offline these days to deal with any issues. Give them greater support at home that they need not look for it outside. A right kind of overall support can do wonders in their lives.

6. Give their visions the priority required..

Set aside your desires for them and give their visions a beautiful uplift. Stay hopeful of their dreams rather than your fears. And wait for the wonderful future to unfold!

Adventures of teen moms!

At 40, you think you have seen it all, but not for long. There's your teenage kid saying the same and you wonder about the sanity of that statement. As your kid goes into preteens, every mother starts dreaming for their kids, wondering about the time the kids will mature and then it happens. Your kid is into teen-hood and the much dared and talked about period is here. Trust me; you never will be prepared for your teen kids. Whatever you say, they definitely say the opposite. They become independent in spirit, that you miss out on your links with them. They talk and act very adult like making their own decisions...it could be a dress to wear ( Of course, jeans is the best dress for anytime!), they do their own hair dress( sometime you wonder whether they have combed their hair at all and at times they come with 2 different rubber bands on 2 ponytails!!), they have the weirdest color sense ( mix and match kurtis and you better not pass any comments), they talk nonstop with their buddies over the phone( and they tell you only the essentials of life according to them)and if not they keep texting day and night, and how much ever bags you give them ( they go for one back pack which has faded over the years) and they read books ( whether it is from the school library or public library, you have no say in it), and spend their splendid teen-hood in the ever techy tabs and i pads and they also surprise you with offering help in your cooking ( inspired by the Master chef programs in T.V) and you better not fuss about the safety of giving them knives or stove for that matter, after all they are teens(!) and tell me now...my daughter is only in her mid teens and do you think I have seen it all!

Having a teen in your home needs a great balancing act. It is almost like having a glass vessel and walking on a thin rope high on great heights somewhere. At times, you need to juggle balls, at times you have to dance to their tunes but at the end of the day, you make sure you are available to them as their friend, philosopher and guide. And make sure, they are aware of that fact that you are available for them anytime. When they need to share their laughter, when they need a shoulder to cry on, and even when they want to vent their feelings on you and show you their special attitude, just be there. At times, you need to have “the talks” with your children (especially on the topic of law of attraction towards the other gender!) and at times you should simply know how to listen and learn just not to voice your wise opinions and wait for them to realize…Yes! It is not easy to be a teen mom.

When I look back to my own teenage, even though my mom never had the so called special talks with us, my brother, sister and I were aware that she was there at the background at any given time. Believe me, it helped a great deal. Her watchful eyes always made us go in the right path. I have an aunt who says “Don’t do things that I wouldn’t do” as her parting remark always. It makes a lot of sense to say that to your teen kids. It is a pleasure to watch them grow…and it pleases me to know that this little daughter of mine will soon be a wonderful “grown up” citizen of this world. And the time will come soon to let them go and to see them spread their wings high up in the sky! So just enjoy your time with them for now…embrace each moment as it comes! Three cheers to all teen moms!